A wife got so mad at her husband she packed his bags and told him to get out.
As he walked to the door she yelled, “I hope you die a long, slow, painful death.”
He turned around and said, “So, you want me to stay?”
This came from Penny’s sister J in Toronto.
Attempting to Set A New Password:
Website: Sorry your password has expired – you must register a new one.
User: Did anyone discover that password and hack my computer?
Website: No, but your password has expired – you must get a new one.
User: Why then do I need a new one as that one seems to be working pretty good?
Website: Well, you must get a new one as they automatically expire every 30 days.
User: Can I use the old one and just re-register it?
Website: No, you must get a new one.
User: I don’t want a new one as that is one more thing for me to remember.
Website: Sorry, you must get a new one.
User: OK, roses
Website: Sorry you must use more letters.
User: OK, pretty roses
Website: No good, you must use at least one number.
User: OK, 1 pretty rose
Website: Sorry, you cannot use blank spaces.
User: OK, 1prettyrose
Website: Sorry, you must use additional letters.
User: OK, 1fuckingprettyrose
Website: Sorry, you must use at least one capital letter.
User: OK, 1FUCKINGprettyrose
Website: Sorry, you cannot use more than one capital letter in a row.
User: OK, 1Fuckingprettyrose
Website: Sorry, you cannot use that password as you must use additional letters.
User: OK, 1Fuckingprettyroseshovedupyourarseifyoudon’tgivemeaccessrightfuckingnow
Website: Sorry, you cannot use that password, it has already been taken.
A nurse received a call from an anxious patient. “I’m diabetic and I’m afraid I’ve had too much sugar today,” the caller said.
“Are you light-headed?” my colleague asked.
“No,” the caller answered, “I’m a brunette.”