15 December 2013 – Amusements

The game show contestant was only 200 points behind the leader and about to answer the final question, worth 500 points! “To be today’s champion,” the show’s smiling host intoned, “name two of Santa’s reindeer.”

The contestant, a man in his early thirties, gave a sigh of relief, gratified that he had drawn such an easy question. “Rudolph!” he said confidently, “and … Olive!”

The studio audience started to applaud (like the little sign above their heads said to do,) but the clapping quickly faded into mumbling, and the confused host replied, “Yes, we’ll accept Rudolph, but could you please explain Olive?“

“You know,” the man circled his hand forward impatiently and began to sing, “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer had a very shiny nose. And if you ever saw it, you would even say it glowed. Olive, the other reindeer …”

Three absent-minded writers were busy discussing a writing project on the platform, while waiting for the non-stop sleeper train from Chicago to New York. The announcement was made, and the train finally arrived. There was considerable confusion among the eagerly waiting passengers as the train pulled in to the platform. Passengers rushed inside the train, and the train left. However, one of the writers was not able to get on to the train in the confusion.

A passer-by who saw all this came up to the writer and told him not to worry, that there was a good hotel just around the corner from the station and that he could catch the early train the next morning.

The writer replied, “Oh, I am not worried for myself, but the real problem is that I was the one who was supposed to catch the train, and the other two of them who got on the train, actually just came to see me off.”

A little girl was wearing one of those Medical Alert bracelets. Someone asked her what the bracelet was for. She replied, “I’m allergic to nuts and eggs.”

The person asked, “Are you allergic to dogs or cats?”

The little girl said, “I don’t know, I’ve never eaten a dog or cat.”